A Short Note To A Tinder Date

Number 7 was a weird one, that’s all I can say…

“Dear Weirdo,

We met through Tinder, you know that, I know that. Looking back at pictures of you, I don’t even know why we matched in the first place.

We texted for about a week before you asked me out. To be honest, I should have said no as I wasn’t in any sort of state to date a guy after what happened with number 6, or the guys before him. I wasn’t ready.

I just didn’t know.

However, I agreed to a meeting but insisted for it not to be a date. I mean that’s what it was but it helped me not to freak out beforehand. You picked me up and we actually had a lovely evening, talked a lot and got along very well. You were a good distraction, it stopped me from thinking too much, at least for one evening.

We kissed on the first date and on pretty much every other of the seven or eight dates we had. Eight dates but we only had sex once, on the last date. You wanted to have sex with me from the very beginning. Each date you tried, you tried so hard but I wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t even want to sleep in the same bed as you, nor did I want you to touch me, at least not at first.

You slept in the guestroom, more than once.

I felt guilty and didn’t understand my reaction. I was confused as I never felt hesitant about sleeping with a guy as much as I felt that way about you. Even now I can’t grasp what the reason was, I guess we just didn’t match and my heart new but my brain didn’t.

I don’t regret sleeping with you but I also can’t say that it was worth the number. It was very awkward and doubtlessly the worst sex that I have ever had. I can’t even begin to describe how awkward it was.

To some instance that was probably my fault as I kept thinking of other guys while you were trying your lucky down there. By the way, that had never happened before and has never since then. On the other hand, you also didn’t live up to what you had been telling me about your skills being extraordinary and that I “wouldn’t regret it.” It’s not like I trusted your words, but it also resulted in a big disappointment for me, and an even greater embarrassment for you.

I should’ve just stopped it. 

Anyway, girls have pride as well and I wanted to please you, just as much as I wanted to please every other guy I slept with. But with you, it just wasn’t going to happen. Believe me, I tried! You lost it and there was no way of getting it back any time soon. I told you it was fine and that things like that happen, which I didn’t just say to make you feel better. Eventually, we gave up and continued watching a movie.

The next morning you left and said goodbye. We never spoke again, saw each other again or even acknowledged the other one’s existence. I am glad about how things ended, and that they ended. Anything else would have just been ridiculously awkward.

The girl who is glad it happened just once.”

Letter No. 8 …